I have a perverse fascination with war, I think. I like seeing people bludgeoning and hacking each other to bloody pulps, all in the name of nation and "good" in general.

But who can say who's right and who's not? Everyone who fights usually has something, be it an idea or a dream, to fight for. Something that drives them to risk their lives and the lives of many others to reach that goal, that unfathomable dream. It gives me goosebumps seeing people sacrificing themselves for this idea. Seems like they're beyond being human, you know? Like they embody something beyond themselves and that this thing gives them strength not normally seen in them had they not been fighting for it. It's wonderful to witness such a thing. Such a miracle.

Maybe the reason for my fascination with war is this: I want to see this miracle firsthand and the only way I could do so is to be in a situation wherein such doings are possible. War brings out the best and worst in people, I think. Although not many people would agree with me, I think that once in a while, we do need wars so that we can remember that we do not exist for ourselves alone. That there is something more important than ourselves. That we are connected to each other whether we liked it or not.

Hmmm... late night snack of mocha ice cream and black coffee isn't good for me. Just watched LOTR 2 with my mother this afternoon and I couldn't getthe fight scenes out of my head. That and Faith Hill's Breathe. This is all your fault Neechan!!! I STILL am NOT going to write that scene about Faye and Rus, alright?!