Perfectionist?...!?!?!

Took a tickle.com test regarding birth orders and this is the result I got:

Birth Order Full Report:

Feifu, your position as only child shows most strongly in your ability to set goals. Well... technically I'm not an only child per se. I mean, there was Elaine after all. So I had a sister for like six months, was it? But then since she died when I was just three years old, I barely remember what it felt like to have a sister; and since was never followed by another sibling, I grew up as an only child.

Similar to other only children, you tend to be very organized (siguro tumataas ang mga kilay ng iba sa inyo nung nabasa niyo to no? What with the memory of Emski's and my dorm room heheheh ^^) and punctual (Er yeah, I hate to wait). By having a great deal of time alone with your parents growing up, you were able to pick up some "adult" skills such as responsibility and dependability (errrr...). Like other only children, you probably don't miss deadlines (huh? ano daw?) and being on time is very important to you. People around you can generally rely on you to get things done. You are attentive to detail and tend to be a perfectionist (please refer to my preceding post).

Here's what the site mentions about people born as the "only child"... I can't help but agree in most of the descriptions hehehe...

Only children's primary interactions at home customarily involve adult caregivers. These early interactions play a crucial role in determining what personality traits these children develop and continue to manifest even as adults. Commonly, only children become the primary focus of their family's attention. Only children usually grow up receiving a great deal of their parents' attention, love and resources. As a result, only children who experience these conditions usually foster a positive self-image, which is often carried over to adulthood. Only children may also grow accustomed to being the center of attention. (Just something I've noticed, people either shut up and look at me when I talk or they ignore me entirely. The former makes me nervous coz of the attention focused on me and I keep worrying that I'd say something wrong; the latter just makes me feel ticked off till I turn rather bitchy until I finally get their attention then either go back to being all smiles again or walk off in a huff thinking I don't need those people and can do what needs be done on my own anyway.) Motivated by the desire to maintain this caring and loving relationship, only children sometimes begin to identify and conform to their parents' demands (sou ka? hmmm, that's not what my mom says ^_^). Caregivers' high expectations often lead only children to become goal-oriented and high achievers (Well if you're gonna do something anyway, why not do it in the best possible way you are capable off? Right?). Only children often excel in areas they think are important (So if I wanted to become a rocket scientist all of a sudden I'd probabyly excel in that? Somehow I don't think I have the brain and patience for that hehehe). Because only children usually grow up in environments with no companions of their own age (ah, true), they tend to manifest an unwillingness to share (a.k.a. SELFISHNESS hehehe ^^0). Only children often feel content when things are predictable and under control (this goes soooo very much against what I read about those born in the year of the Monkey *sigh*). A high percentage are punctual and get things done efficiently.

Occupations that are generally well suited for only children include politicians (no thanks!), astronauts (errrr...), college professors (hahah! does this mean I'd make a great Clinical Instructor? Hmmm... my poor terrorized would-be students hahahahahah!!) or members of other learned groups. This is because only children are usually attracted to professions that are powerful and prestigious (somehow nursing doesn't really fit in that description). Only children routinely have a strong desire to be successful.

Advantages of Being an Only Child

Goal Oriented: Close supervision by adults, while often perceived as tiresome by children, tends to build a foundation for the development of organizational skills. Attentive caregivers often tend to emphasize to their children, from a very early age, the importance of being focused, organized and task-oriented. Now, as an adult, people are likely to think of you as a punctual and determined person. Chances are, you are reliable and don't miss deadlines. You probably don't make empty promises and feel that you need to be in control most of the time. You tend to be a perfectionist. ----> Okay... I guess this answers my question in my previous post ^^0 You are inclined to take responsibility for your actions and do not believe in making excuses.

Achievement Oriented: In general, most parents are usually very eager to put forward both emotional and financial resources to ensure that their only child is happy and successful. If only children grow up in households that emphasize education and hard work, they usually readily absorb these values and apply them to their lives. Often being the sole focus of their parents attention leads to a goal-oriented approach to life, thus achievement becomes almost second nature to many only children. Compared to other only children you are less focused on achievement. The influence of birth order on personality is not a simple matter. In some cases, the personality traits believed to be characteristic of individuals of your birth order type may not perfectly match your own traits. This happens due to your unique experiences and dynamics within your family. Your family environment may not have placed a high importance on individual achievement, but did place great emphasis on hard work (Yeah, kinda), being part of a team effort or additional values similar to these.

High Self-Esteem: More often than not, only children have high self-esteem, which they develop at a very young age due to the nurturing presence of caring adults. In return for their caregivers' love and attention, only children tend to be obedient and keen to help out. As adults, only children are likely to maintain close relationships with their parents and feel that their families have always been an important part of their life. Compared to other only children you have somewhat lower self-esteem (Is this good or bad?). The influence of birth order on personality is not a simple matter. In some cases, the personality traits believed to be characteristic of individuals of your birth order type may not perfectly match your own traits. This happens due to your unique experiences and dynamics within your family. There are many ways that your family environment might not have placed a high importance on fostering your self-esteem. In addition, stressful life events such as a death in the family, divorce and remarriages, among other things, may have negatively affected your self-esteem.

Disadvantages of Being an Only Child

Excessive Competitiveness: In general, only children are usually showered with attention and resources from their parents. As a result of receiving so much attention, motivation and positive reinforcement, some only children set very high aspirations for themselves and become highly competitive. Often the desire to win and be the best is ingrained from a young age, and although it is a powerful driving force, it can cause problems if this approach gets out of balance. While your competitive and passionate nature is one of the reasons for your success, your excessive competitiveness at times may lead to interpersonal problems. It may not be unusual for you to lose perspective and become so immersed in an activity that you become hostile (heheheh ^^0). When totally engrossed in a competition, you may have a tendency to become self-absorbed and come across as an insensitive and intimidating person.

Excessive Need for Attention: In most cases, only children are the primary focus of their caregivers. From a very early age, only children associate being the center of attention with being loved and valued. Only children tend to feel energized when they are the center of attention. However, a constant need for attention is usually detrimental to relationships with others. Because of your constant desire to be the center of attention, you may come across as self-absorbed (Ouch @_@). In addition, when you make capturing the attention of others your main priority, you allow forces outside of yourself to control how you feel. When you are the center of attention you are likely to feel that others care about you. When you are not the center of attention, you probably feel upset and disappointed. (Oh my... I guess I am like that, although in my defense I only go on complete bitch-mode on people who chose me to lead then refuse to listen and comply when I ask something of them that would be for the group. Oh, and to sales personel who are being very rude to either me, my mom, or my friends. I mean, you're there to serve costumers, so please do it with a smile so we'll come back and buy from you again... is that too much to ask?) Everyone likes to receive a certain amount of attention from others, but a dependence upon it is something you might want to reflect upon.

Unwillingness to Share: Typically, only children adhere to the rule that what is theirs is theirs alone. (Depends on who is asking, really. And how often they've asked in the past. Kung naman kasi wala ng ibang ginawa yung tao kundi umasa sayo when kaya naman niya na mag-isa then di ako magpapamartyr at bigyan/tulungan pa siya no! Gagawin ko lang siyang leech at dependent sakin, and I don't think I'm doing him/her any favors if that's the case). They tend to grow up in environments in which they are not required to share. As a result, many only children become adults who have great difficulty when it comes to sharing. Because of your unwillingness to share with others, you tend not to be aware when you become inflexible and somewhat selfish. (I've been called this just because I didn't want to give a piece of yellow paper. Eto kasi bakit ha... our prof announced that we'd be having a quiz after the break before she gave us a 30-minute break. So lahat kami lumabas, bumili ng food, drinks, whatever. I forgot to bring paper that day so habang break bumili ako ng gagamitin ko for the rest of the day. Pagbalik sa classroom naghihingi yung mga classmates ko ng papel. Ayoko bigyan. Ang damot ko daw. Hello?! Kaya nilang bumili ng food at mag-yosi pero pisong papel lang di nila kaya?! Di ko binigyan. Pinabayaan ko silang magalit if trip nilang magalit. They had 30 minutes to buy their own paper so why didn't they? The prof sided with me. Told me not to give them any paper, or if gusto nila bayaran nila ng double. I don't really see how that can be called selfishness since nasa tama naman ako.) You may be impatient when things do not go your way (Hay, sino bang hindi?). At times, you may even feel lonely and surprised that people don't approach you when they could use your support. This may happen because, having observed you in the past, they notice you don't feel at ease when sharing. People may infer that you have little concern for others, and that you don't want to help out. (If I remember correctly, Quibs told me around a year ago that she was hesitant to talk to me. Nakakatakot daw kasi ako. Nakakaintimidate. Tapos nung nakausap na niya ko narealize daw niya na hindi naman pala ako mahirap kausapin hehehe ^^)

Medyo eye-opener din kahit pano yung test na to. Guess it made me realize na I should relax a bit on certain things. I'm trying to, but I just can't instantly turn off my supposed attention to details and other "only child" habits. Guess they're already ingrained in my personality. Mom told me before that if people didn't like her, she doesn't go out of her way to make them like her. I feel the same in the sense that I don't wish to linger around people who refuse to accept me as I am. I guess I'm just secure enough with the way I am right now that I don't feel the need to conform.